Theologically, I'm not really sure that what I am proposing is even possible and I know that this silly list will be of the last concern when I actually do get to heaven, but while I am still in the middle of writing really serious stuff (sermons, bible studies, last will and testaments) I needed to drain the silly out of my brain and this is what came to mind first.
There are big things I want to ask God like these:
- Do you really pick and choose like a 2nd grader playing "Duck, Duck, Damn"?
- If our ideas of "fair" are not so important, why were we made to be so consumed with "fair"?
- There really was not Plan B after Eden was there, it was Plan A (the cross) the whole time, right?
- Who would win in a fight, Batman or Captian Ameirca?
- Is Starbucks coffee laced with crack, like I suspect it is?
- Would my head explode if I listened to a CD of a band composed of Jimmy Page, John Fogerty, the one armed drummer from Def Leppard, Anthony Micheal and all lyrics written by Rich Mullins? (Shoot, my head is about to explode just typing this and thinking about it?)
- Squirrels - jumpy - The only logical conclusion is that acorns are laced with crack as well. Am I onto something there? (Note to self, eat acorn before the end of the day, to test brillant theory)
- Would the Apostle Paul cuss if he had to put $4 gas in his car? I thought so.
- My friend Will just texted me this one and I think it is a good one: Is there water on Uranus? Wait a minute..., that is hilarious... water on your.... I'll go to hell if I ask God that Will, so I can't ask that one. Sinner.
- What is Your favorite number? Mine is 4 then 3 then 9 then 4 again.
- OK, you can shoot straight with me, Amy Winehouse is an alien from another planet, right?
- Can we have a one on one round robin tournament in heaven between the clones (because all of these people may not make it to heaven) of Dr. J, Micheal Jordan, Magic Johnson, Pistol Pete Marivich, Tiny Nate Archibald, Oscar Robertson, Larry Bird and a play in game between John Havlicek and Kobe Bryant?
- Can I ride on the ark?
